WWE Royal Rumble 2019

Writer #1: Sir, we need to reduce the lengths of our shows, especially this show. We’ve got two matches that each last an hour, and while the show you’ve laid out is packed with good wrestling action, having fans stay up until midnight to catch the whole thing is just too much. Even New Japan have been—

Vince McMahon: (punches writer in throat while wearing brass knuckles) Now, goddammit, does any one of you dumb people born after 1982 have anything to say about my fucking show?

Rest of writers: Noooooooo, sir, we’ve no objections at all!

Writer #1: gurgle

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