Dragon Buster (version found in the Switch port of “Namco Museum Archives Volume One” played for review)
I don't want to ever hear another complaint about the core mechanics of "The Adventure of Link" ever again. The second Zelda has its flaws, but put it next to "Dragon Buster" and it looks like "Mega Man 2" in comparison. Movement is painful, attacking feels random even though it definitely isn't, and I never found a viable strategy for combat beyond mashing the attack button while being juggled in the hopes I accidentally kill the opponent (yes, this is viable, somehow). Maybe the original arcade version plays better, but this port is hysterically awful, almost backflipping into post-ironic bliss.
3